It'll Never Show On Camera
Foreword
collection is mostly true. Perhaps here and there I might be charged
with an unwitting confounding of memory and desire. If so, some of the others
who were there might remember parts a little differently and I've probably
exaggerated a few things to highlight how we felt at the time, but it mostly
happened this way. |
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I guess there are laws about including real people in stories so I've tinkered
with the names of anyone I worked with. You know, the bit about any
resemblance being strictly coincidental and all. And anyway, I won't tell you
about guys like Captain Crazy or the salesmen who used to pose as the Flying
Zamboni Family and cadge free drinks in bars until they'd get bounced for
insulting hookers. Now and then I may have used the real names of people who
wandered in and out of my career when it wasn't their fault. So if anybody I
used to work with thinks they recognize themselves here, consider it
coincidental. But, thanks. It was a good time.
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| Now, if I could only remember the name of the guy in that civil war TV show when our studio crew used to get blitzed every week trying to do the live beer commercials... |
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Camera 1
In which we learn how a boy in his formative years is lured into a life behind the TV cameras. |
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Get your pants on, here comes the boss. The disk jockey who hated women's underwear. What a turkey! Captain Detroit. |
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Camera 2
In which our young hero is introduced to the strange customs and rituals practiced behind the TV cameras. |
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Don't worry, it'll never show on camera. If I'm not there start without me! Pour it again Sam. Lawrence Welk was the best. Just humor him. But he was a big tipper. Season's greetings. R2D2 and the nekked ladies. Take my wife. Please. Oh, how we laughed on the night we were wed. Computers don't lie. |
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Camera 3
In which we discover many of the peculiar beings who inhabit the world behind the TV cameras. |
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